I feel like im the only one in the world
Up until now i have felt like i am the only one in this world going through what im going through. Last year i had to register as a sex offender. i am a 35yr mother of three and a wife of 18yrs. this has been the hardest thing for me to deal with my whole life. I never went to trial. i wish i would have fought. there was no evidence it was a "he said she said " issue. on the day i went to court for an extension on my case the state attorney said if i didnt take the plea deal that was it, she was coming after me and if i lost it would be 15yrs in prison and to register for life anyway. she bullied me. i have never been in trouble with the law ever! at all! so you could imagine my fright. i am still trying to figure out how to fight this now i have had to move out of my house with my family and go to my moms since my house is close to a school. im lost, scared confused and feel so helpless. im hoping this page can help.
I can definitely relate. I am a 33 year old single mother who has to register for life. My daughter will be 11 next month and her father passed away when she was younger. After her father passed away I went through a terrible depression, and I also suffer from PTSD. Never in my life have I been in trouble with the law, and unfortunately my poor judgement during a very traumatic, vulnerable, time in my life has drastically affected our lives. We had to leave the home my daughter grew up in because there was an in home childcare down the street, and she had to be without me for 9 months while I was in work release. She now suffers from horrible separation anxiety considering her and I have never been without each other since the day she was born. All I want is to be able to be there for my daughter and take her to the park, and to great america... all the things that she loves and I cannot take her. I am in sex offender treatment and have been for the past two years and I am about to graduate next month. I have made a lot of progress mentally, and physically, but this will still follow me and my family for the rest of my life. I'm trying to go back to school to get a job as a re entry specialist to help those who are released from jail/prison reintegrate into society by helping them find housing, jobs, and support. It is now going to be extremely difficult for me to get jobs in this field. I just want to help people. I truly am a good person, but this label makes it really difficult for people to see the real me. Hang in there. You are strong, you have made it this far, and you seem to have a great support system. Lean on them, keep your head up and know that you can do anything you put your mind to.
Sounds very familiar. I am familiar with the coercive tactics prosecutors use, esp. on low income, uneducated, mentally disabled or indigent people.
Legal entitlement for the rich or those that have access (see below) such as this is not new, but is worse now because the public has developed an appetite for harsh punishment, even if it means scapegoating. Prosecutors can violate ethics laws to appease judges using you as a bargaining chip. What is problematic is the intention. If a cop, for example is accused of a sex crime, his familiarity with tactics of cops and prosecutors gives him a HUGE edge in what not to do or say. He/she knows his or her rights verbatim. Prosecutors work with court appointed attorneys very hard to work a plea deal.
The #MeToo movement is extremely active and is already working on the incoming administration..."We congratulate President-elect Joe Biden and Vice President-elect Kamala Harris on their historic win. We look forward to working with them and their administration on moving the Survivors Agenda forward"
I am not saying victims don't exist. They do. However the fact that someone can be accused of a sex offense will most often get next to zero effort with his/her legal council, most often abt. 95% of the time will simply plead out his case, and spend the rest of his/her life on the lepers list.
Often times the lines are blurred between what might be a moral mistake and an actual legal violation. They don't teach this in high school as a required course but should probably do it. We are living in an increasingly SVU world. Strangely I never felt we lived in an exceptionally moral country.
I'm so sorry. You're not alone, though. If that helps. Surely this site can show you that.
You are not alone. Vicki Henry