I am 15 years old and have experienced far too much for my age. I have seen my father in handcuffs and seen him behind glass. I have sat in court and listened to all of his charges being listed, all of the terrible crimes he has committed. I see him for less than 39 hours in one year. People work for longer than that in one week. I have seen child pornography on his electronic devices, horrific enough to give me nightmares to this day. I have testified both for and against him. I have prayed and got nothing but silence.
The registry has done just as much damage. My family and I have been harassed. We’ve gotten animal feces smeared on our front door. Years ago, when my sibling was 11 or so, she was bullied due to something she had no involvement in. She was pushed down a flight of stairs. The bullying became severe to the point we had to move.
Life on the registry has caused both my father and mother to turn to drugs in the past (they are clean now). My father was homeless for around 2 years because everywhere we can afford is in a disallowed zone. At a homeless shelter, he was cornered and threatened. He was unable to get a job, which drastically impacted our finances. We have lived on the verge of homelessness for years.
My own family has stopped talking to my sibling and I due to my father’s actions. We have been isolated. I missed out on my younger family members’ childhoods. We are left out on holidays. We have struggled financially and gotten almost no assistance.
I live everyday in fear, with this secret hanging over my head. If my own family will leave me over something I didn’t do, my friends probably will, too.
When people scribble ‘rapist’ on a sex offenders’ window, nobody considers what his 8 year old daughters’ reaction will be. Nobody thinks about how his 8 year old daughter will feel when her best friends are torn away from her. Nobody has ever thought of me and I have doubts that anyone ever will.
Thank you for reading.
Anonymous
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Has anyone replied to “Young Innocent Victims”? The fact that no one seems to have written a comment to such a heartbreaking letter gives me great sadness. Have people replied but they were not posted? Has NO ONE replied to this letter? I will.
Dear Anonymous,
hank you for posting. Beautifully written. I hear you. Have hope. I hope you and your sister can move forward. Do not live in fear. Hugs.
My daughter’s classmates said “Your mother’s a pervert” to her in whispers in the classroom.
She told me that she missed her childhood because she had to take care of me when all I could do was cry.
I’m so sorry for all that the children of registrants go through, as well as other family members. Nobody speaks of the harm to them, a law that is supposed to be for the protection of children has caused a lot of harm to them. When will people start to see that there are ways to have smart laws, ways that will come closer to protecting communities? I am truly sorry that children, and families are torn apart and abused in our society.
This is such a sad commentary on our society. One of so many sad commentaries on our society.
Anonymous, please do not give up on finding support and understanding; it is out there. You speak and act from the heart. You speak and act with such maturity for a 15 year old. Hold your head high. You have done absolutely nothing wrong.
This is a very sad commentary on our society; one of many sad commentaries on our society these days.
Anonymous, please don’t give up on finding support and understanding; it is out there. You speak and act with the maturity of someone twice your age. You speak and act from the heart. Hold your head high. You have done nothing wrong.
Unfortunately, this is a story I know all too well, from the point of view of the mother of 2 young boys who went through all the bullying you put forth. Then, when they were old enough, they were blamed for something they did not do, but were under suspicion just because they were the sons of a person on the sex offender registry.
Now they are registrants. What their father did was considered proof enough that they would do the same.
It gets better, but it hurts badly for a long time. The innocent spouse is supposed to have known all about what went on. How could you not know, the spouse is asked. Mostly because we can’t read minds.
As someone who has been accused of a sex crime but didn’t have to register, I just want to say that none of this was your fault. Megan’s law needs to be repealed because of how it affects the person’s families. The crime history should only be available to law enforcement. Just because your dad committed a crime 20 years ago doesn’t mean he is still horrible and you are not a bad person because of it. If you are the child of a person who committed a sex offense you need to hear this. Its not your fault. You matter. Stay strong, were going to get through this together. The lives of the children of former offenders matter. You’re worth it.