Forced registry 17yrs post conviction

Growing up, my life was somewhat hectic. My mother and father divorced when I was still very young, later they both met new love interests, remarried and both got divorced, again. Needless to say I moved around quite a bit. My mother was an alcoholic my entire life so I primarily lived with my father and visited my mother during the holidays. When my father went through his second divorce, he couldn’t afford to take care of me so I was “given” back to my mother. This wasn’t the best decision for me. My mother was still an alcoholic, as was her current husband, and at the time my mother was dealing with undiagnosed schizophrenia and bipolar disorder. Life was going to get much more interesting in the following years.

Three years after I was “given” back to my mother, she too went thorough a divorce, and I was once again uprooted from my school and where my friends lived and replanted in a different state; Indiana. I started school the following summer, where I rejoined the swim team, did well in school academically and made many friends. The home life didn’t get any better, unfortunately. My mother was on number two of trying to kill herself, she was drinking to get drunk everyday while smoking two packs of cigarettes’. Her schizophrenia was getting worse as well, she was locking me out of the house continuously claiming I was part of a T.V. show that was recording her life and that everyone was in on it, and she wanted her cut in the proceeds. She was unhinged, and I was at the frontlines of her mental breakdown.

While at swim practice one day, my sophomore year; I met my high school sweetheart, we’ll call her Ashley. Ashley was a blonde, blue eyes beauty. She was athletic, and was quite literally the smartest person in our grade, “she later went on to be Valedictorian,” so yeah she really was the smartest. She was my savior in a way during the hard times, although, the good times wouldn’t last. I was arrested thanks to my mother who claimed I was unruly and disrespectful and wanted me, “gone.” This might be, hard to really say, I was probably sick of being locked out of the house, her drinking and dealing with her mental collapse. I was arrested for criminal mischief and sentenced to three weeks in juvenile detention during summer break,” the summer before my Junior year.

Once I was released, it was to my disbelief that Ashley still wanted to be my girlfriend. She was my everything at the time, “first love type stuff.” Once school started back up things went back to how they were, great school life, bad home life. A few months after my junior year started, my mother bough a small, cozy, two bedroom house about a two miles from my high school. The house was surrounded by cornfields, faced by a thin, rubber coated county road that made you feel like you were in the middle of nowhere. It was blissful, to be honest, for the time being.

A few months after my mother and I moved into the new house, she began to drink heavily again, her mental condition was getting worse and I was once again being locked out of the house for absolutely no reason other than because I was the host of a reality T.V. show and my mother wanted her cut of the proceeds. During this time frame, from moving into our new house, I had become quite close with Ashley’s parents, they were aware of my mothers mental decline, as was my swim coach, school counselor and really, everyone. One day Ashley surprised me with tickets for us to go and see Jack Johnson live in concert in Indianapolis. We were going to head strait to the concert after school on the upcoming Friday. My mother okayed me to go so the plans were set. Yet on my way to the concert she called me to say that I had to turn around immediately because I didn’t make my bed, which was odd because I rarely made my bed. I was upset and visually frustrated. I was following Ashley to her house so she could drop her car off and just take my car down to Indianapolis. We had just left school when my mom had called so I decided to just fold and go make my bed, yet I was upset and turned the car too sharp while I was turning around and lost control, running strait into a light pole, which then proceeded to fall onto the car. From this point on, my life was going to derail.

My mother arrived on the scene and immediately proceeded to punch me, “with officers and fire crew all around us.” She was charged with assault and public intoxication, she was drunk on arrival. I was taken to the hospital and then taken to child services, where I would live for eight months while the state tried to find a place for me to live. Ashley’s parents were in the process of adopting me when my father decided to come and finally get me out of child services. My dad lied to the state and told them that he had a place he rented for he and I somewhere in town, yet he actually hadn’t, so I live at Ashley’s for a month while he was getting the apartment secured. I was excited to live with my dad, yet things weren’t as I though they were. He did get that apartment, or duplex I should say, but it wasn’t for “us,” it was for only me. At 17 I was living on my own, no guidance, no curfew, and no care. I was free to do whatever I wanted.

At this point in my life, I was an All-American swimmer, maintain a B average in school and had sworn into the Navy, I had plans, I was going to be a Navy Seal. Colleges were scouting me at swim competitions, schools such as Michigan University, Purdue University and a few smaller colleges. Michigan offered me a full athletic scholarship, I had real options for my life. Although, shortly after I swore into the Navy, agreeing to ship off to basic once I graduated high school, Ashley broke up with me. I was devastated, the only normality I felt was gone. Her reasoning for breaking up with me, because she wanted to be with someone who had a normal family; wasn’t even me she disliked, it was my situation. I was lost at this point, first heartbreak.

I started to party, rebel, smoke cigarettes and care less about myself. I felt like everyone in my life left me, there was no one there, no one to fill the  void I felt. I started missing school, missing swim practices. Now this is still my Junior year, right at the end of it so I managed to still do okay grade wise, and it wasn’t swim season so missed practice for swimming didn’t count for anything, they were optional. Yet the summer going into my Senior year was a game changer. I was fully hooked on cigarettes, getting drunk at least once a week and was feeling lost. I’d even acquired a roommate, we’ll call him Steven. I’d met Steven my Sophomore year in Chemistry class. He was a senior at the time when he and I met, so when he became my roommate he was three years older than me, graduated already and able to buy us alcohol. He was my ticket to fun, or so I thought. He introduced me to a girl, we’ll call her Jenny. Jenny was funny, and attractive. She had a 21 year old boyfriend who she would talk shit about constantly when she came over to hangout with us at our duplex. Jenny and I had a summer fling, we were seeing one another but nothing serious, she still had a boyfriend. Once school started her and I saw each other maybe one more time before we stopped talking all together.

I turned 18 the summer before my Senior year of high school, so legally I was now an adult. I still dressed the same, longish hair, skinny jeans and Vans. I knew little about the real world, if anything. Senior year felt quick, I was still attending, missing maybe one-two days a week, yet still passing. My swimming coach was worried about me, he knew my situation and told me that I needed to quite the smoking and drinking, it would destroy my chances for increased performance in the pool. He was right, so I did cut back and was swimming laps and hitting times just like I’d had the years prior. It was October now, swim season had started and my life seemed to be getting back to how it was, I was over the break-up with Ashley at this point and was focused on becoming a Navy Seal. One day, my roommate had the idea of throwing a party, which I was all for, it was Friday night and we were going to let loose. He invited some girls, some old friends. One of the girls he invited, I knew. We’ll call her Rebecca. Rebecca and I has classes together, two to be exact, and we had the same lunch period together. During the party, my roommate Steven told me that Rebecca had a crush on me and that she wanted to “make out” with me. So, her and I did, then later into the party she decided she wanted to sleep in my bed. Her and I fooled around, it was innocent, so I thought. the next day I got a call from one of my friends that said Rebecca’s step-dad was mad and wanted to talk to me, apparently Rebecca had bragged to a friend about fooling around with me and word got back to her step-dad, which didn’t scare me at all, I didn’t think I’d done anything wrong, he was probably just upset because, well, it’s his step-daughter.

I had plans that weekend, the day after the party, to drive down and visit my sister in Missouri, about a 5 hour drive. Which I did. I got a call while in Missouri from my school principal asking if I was going to be in school the following Monday, which I was. It was a weird call yet I figured he was just him making sure his swim star was going to be continuing his good attendance so he could swim. Boy was I wrong. On Monday, during first period I was called into the office, and as soon as I entered the principals office I was arrested. I was shocked, at this point I had zero knowledge of why I was being arrested. The cops arresting me wouldn’t tell me anything, and every time I asked, they would tell me that I would be informed of everything once I got into questioning.

I was led into an interrogation room, handcuffed to a pole mounted in the middle of a small table and left there. Still zero knowledge of why I was there. In walks a lady, about 45 minutes later, she sits down and the first thing out of her mouth is, “do you like virgins?” I didn’t understand the question. She continued on by asking me if I knew who Rebecca and Jenny were. Which I replied, “yes, why?” She asked me if I’d ever had sexual contact with either of these girls, (mind you, I still have no understanding in why I was arrested); which I replied, “yes.” I was open about it, I was unaware at the time that I had committed a crime, I explained that I had “fingered” Rebecca and I had, had sex with Jenny a few times as her and I were casually seeing one another at one point. (The detective had asked for the sexual details). Once I gave the detective what she’d asked she got up and left. She came back about 30 minutes later with two other officers who said I was being charged with two counts of Sexual Misconduct with a Minor.

It turns out, Rebecca was 15 and so was Jenny. I’d never thought to ask for ages, never crossed my mind. Jenny and I started fooling around when I was 17 and on into when I was the age of 18. Jenny and Rebecca ironically were born the same month, same year, one day apart. Which made me 2 years, 7 months older than them. I was charged and convicted of two counts of Sexual Misconduct with a Minor. Served 72 days in jail, one year house arrest, 10 years probation, was honorably discharged from the Navy, and lost every scholarship I was offered and then required to attend a “secondary school” provided by the high school I was currently going to. The charges didn’t really have an effect on how anyone saw me, I still had the same friends, the same teachers I went to visit still treated me with respect and I was even allowed to go to gym class at the same school with freshman, (I was missing one gym credit that was needed to graduate). I was never banned from going to school, in fact it was as though the school didn’t care. Sure my life as I’d planned for was impossible to achieve now, but I wasn’t treated as some sex predator. I had two felonies on my record but that was it. I wasn’t even required to register as a sex offender, as stated in my conviction. (The defendant is NOT required to register as a Sex Offender). Jenny tried to reach out to me a few times to tell me sorry and that she had no idea that anything like this would happen, yet every time I had to tell her, “I am court ordered to avoid contact with you.”

Lets fast forward a few years, I had developed a drinking habit. I was depressed constantly. With my background, I could barely find a job anywhere other than the food industry. I had regrets, I wanted to be someone and now I was restricted from doing anything that mattered to me. That feeling of, “it doesn’t matter how hard you try, you will never be allowed,” ran ramped in my head. I drank to suppress my feelings of failure and regret. In my drinking days, I’d gone on to rack up a few DUI’s. Four to be exact. first one was in Indiana, about four years after my conviction, second was in Alabama, about 8 years after my conviction, and two in Missouri, which I got a week apart from one another, roughly 15 years after my conviction. I’d gone on to marry twice, have a child with my second wife and eventually began managing restaurants. My convictions were so old at this time that even if a company were to run a background check on me, nothing would show up on convictions other than the DUI’s.

The DUI’s in Missouri changed my entire life even more. I was going through my second divorce, I was living away from my son while the divorce was going on, (our home was in Alabama and I was staying with my sister who was a police officer in Missouri). I was falling way off the wagon, going through every feeling you could imagine. depression, regret, anxiety and feeling lost. My drinking was spiraling, badly. I had obtained a job managing a bar of all places, doing the hiring, fire, inventory, payroll, etc. The worst part was that this bar allowed me to drink while on the clock, yup, that’s right. so quickly after I started managing this bar the DUI’s came quickly . I worked till 2am sometimes 4am and was usually drunk upon leaving. I was a mess. Once I got my second DUI while in Missouri, my sister told me I couldn’t stay under her roof any longer, rightfully so. So I did what I had to do. I walked into the nearest hospital, told them I had a drinking problem and that I needed help. Thank GOD my health insurance had kicked in literally two days prior, I was off to Hollywood, Florida for 35 day of residential rehab.

Shortly after I arrived in rehab, COVID hit. I had just made it. They stopped taking patients four days after I arrived. The rehab for me went really well, I felt a sense of belonging, I felt like missing parts of me were able to be filled finally. While in rehab I was informed that my court dates for the DUI’s were postponed indefinitely until the COVID pandemic were slowed. Which was fine by me, I as on a mission to get sober. After 35 days of rehab I was asked if I would like to go into sober living, up in Pompano Beach, which I of course said yes to, as I had no where else to go, my job was shut down and I was in the middle of a divorce. So I went to sober living. During my 2 years sober living I had three relapses, yet persisted and am thankful today to say I am sober. But, the story isn’t over.

April of 2022, I was finally given a court date for my two DUI’s in Missouri. Now since the DUI’s, a lot had changed. I had dated a few women that I’d met online, I had gotten sober, had great job as a freight broker, just bought a new BMW and had been in a relationship with a girl who I’d eventually moved into a house with in West Palm Beach. And, we had a baby on the way. My court dates were set for early June, 2022. I flew out to Missouri to go to court for my DUI’s without any worry other than some jail time for the charges. The judge sentenced me to 5 years suspended sentence, and 2 years probation. I did lose my license though, which I well deserved. I was told I had to go to probation in Saint Charles to “check-in” and get an Interstate Travel Permit so I could go back to Florida and get my probation transferred there. While I was at probation, the woman who was doing my Interstate Transfer, “my temporary probation officer” told me that before I could leave I would have to register as a Sex Offender because of my charge from High School. I was dumb founded. I couldn’t understand how getting a DUI and coming to a probation office to get paperwork to go back to Florida constitutes my being forced to register for something I was told I didn’t have to register for.

I called my lawyer who told me to just get the Interstate Transfer and go back to Florida. He told me that probation officers think they know everything and that they can’t make me register in a state that I don’t live in. So I did just that. Yet of course, the Missouri probation officer called Florida and told them that I had a “Sex Crime” on my record and told them that I should be required to register, so of course, that’s exactly what they were planning on doing. I called my lawyer again, he said to fly back to Missouri, cancel the Interstate Transfer and we would speak to the judge to get a new hearing to put me on private probation, which he said doesn’t do background checks and is a third-party probation service that only monitors and doesn’t require anything other than court order compliance. Well, that didn’t work and it made things even worse. So, if you cancel an Interstate Transfer by returning to the state of conviction, in this case, returning to Missouri where I got the DUI’s, you give up your residency rights to serve probation in the state you live. I was stuck in Missouri and stuck once again with the same probation officer I ran from. I couldn’t go home to Florida.

My lawyer ordered the probation be required to do an investigation to see if my charges exempted me from being required to register, (which I feel that didn’t actually do). I was told by probation that I had to live in Saint Charles county and had to secure living situations within 48 hours or I would be rearrested for failure to provide a residency address while on probation.  They had me by the balls, literally. So, I went as quick as I could and got a room at an Extended Stay hotel, paying $450 a week, while also having to pay for my life in Florida. I was going broke quickly and my life was falling apart even quicker. I was fired from my job because well, I can’t go back to the office. My girlfriend eventually got an abortion and broke up with me because well, I can’t go back to Florida, my mom dies, I have no license, no car and no job while having to pay outlandish amounts of money for a place to stay as a rundown hotel. (All of this happened within months.) My sister said I could stay with her while I got everything figured out but probation said no, because my sister has a daughter, my niece, and as someone who has a sex crime on their record, it would be illegal. So, still out of luck.

60 plus days had gone by since I was required to remain in Missouri and live in a Hotel. I’d gotten a temporary job selling car warranties. Yeah, one of those people. I was having to pay for storage in Florida, since my girlfriend put all my stuff in storage, hotel rates, food, insurance, child support, cell phone bill, court fees, lawyer fees, and anything else you could think of. I wasn’t making enough money to live. I truly wasn’t. One day I got a call from a detective in Saint Charles stating that I had 72 hours to show up to the registration office and register or I’d have a warrant for “absconding.” So I did, on three separate occasions! Yet they were unable to have me register each time because I wasn’t in the system and there was no order to have me register. During these attempts I was told by probation that where I was “living” was a violation because there was a home daycare within 1000 ft of the hotel. (Mind you, I’m not on the registry at this time).  So I was forced to find another hotel with a time limit of 48 hours, or get arrested. And the only hotel I could find that they would approve was $620 a week. I was broke, financially and mentally. They were winning.

Finally they figured out how to get me to register and called me again. The detective told me I had 24 hours to come in and register. He told me over the phone that they’d put me on a Tier 1 registry, yet when I got there he told me that, “after consideration he’s decided to put me as a Tier 3.” Absolutely not.  He got upset that I was asking questions and we began to argue. He lied to me and he couldn’t give me any reason for why he changed his mind; in less that 12 hours he decided instead of putting me at Tier 1, I’d be a tier 3. He then told me to leave and that we would reschedule, which he then stated that if I don’t leave that he would have my probation officer violate me because he’d already asked me to leave three times. (Which was another lie that I called him out on: there were cameras in the room and I requested that he play them back where it shows I refused to leave, because he never asked me to leave the first time, so he got even more upset.) He told me to come back and he would register the following day. (I secretly recorded this entire interaction).

First thing I did when I got out of that police station was call an Uber, go to the over-priced Hotel I was forced to live in and grab my things. I had been in discussion with a man who would rent me an apartment on Chippewa Street in Saint Louis for $675 a months, way cheaper than the $620 a week I was being forced to pay. So I called my brother, begged him to Venmo me $1100.00 (the move-in amount), which he did, and I was out of Saint Charles. I didn’t care what violations I got, or how much time I got for moving without permission as long as I was out of Saint Charles jurisdiction for probation and registry. I moved into my new apartment over the next few day, I ignored all calls from probation and the registry office. Once I got my mailing address changed to the new apartment all settled, I called and let them know. (about 2 days later). I was told I would be violated, but I didn’t care. My new probation officer was in Downtown Saint Louis. She told me I would need to go down to Olive St. to register, which I did. I was made to register as a Tier 2. I was told I was to make an appearance twice a year. And of course, follow tons of new laws and be restricted like I’d never been before. I was being punished for something that occurred 17 years prior.

Since then, I have moved into my mother’s old house, and I’m still living in Saint Louis. (When she passed, I’d rented her home out, but they’d since moved). I have obtained a lawyer, Mathew Radefel. I went to my local YMCA to get a swimming membership, yet was denied by having their computer screen pop-up with a big red banner with my face stating “Sex Offender.” I was escorted of the premises and given a letter stating that if I am seen on the premises again that I would be considered trespassing and be arrested. (Which is a slap in the face considering I’ve had a YMCA membership in Indiana, Colorado and Alabama well after my conviction in 2008) My home address, my vehicles and where I work are all now public knowledge for anyone to see, even for self-proclaimed “justice warriors.” I talk to my son almost everyday yet I am told that I can never have any type of custody of him because I am on the registry. When he comes to visit we can’t go to any parks, which was something he loved to do with me. I can’t take him to the science museum, the Zoo, or do anything that would be fun for a little boy who is only six years old. I can no longer use my passport because if I do I will be breaking the law because mine isn’t stamped with “Sex Offender” in it. This is a punishment. A punishment well after conviction. This is the only time in my life where I truly felt like the system was broken, like I truly was just a number. I was robbed of my freedom well after I’d “served my time” for my convictions. At this point I can only hope that Mathew Radefel can get me my rightful freedom back.

This is my story, my dark, dark story. Hope whoever reads this can relate and maybe feel less alone in this unjust struggle.

Thank you,

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1 thought on “Forced registry 17yrs post conviction

  1. Hello Phil, what they are doing to you is TOTALLY ILLEGAL! (AN INHUMANE !) IT WAS ALREADY INITIALLY RULED IN YOUR PLEA AGREEMENT DEAL THAT YOU WERE NOT TO BE PLACED ON THE REGISTRY! (THE AGREEMENT WITH MY PLEA DEAL WAS THAT IT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE ONLY FOR 2 TO 3 YEARS WITH A POSSIBLE MAX OF 5 YEARS, AND NO PICTURE ONLINE AND TO BE ANONYMOUS TO THE PUBLIC!!!, WHERE ONLY LAW OFFICIALS WOULD HAVE ACCESS TO THE ANONYMOUS REGISTRATION) Sense of all the irregularity and discrepancies in the statements made by the female (I later found out!)… (Well You probably guessed it but THEY Reneged on their deal, and lied to me (US) on the deal(s) we were promised), and me and you share VERY SIMILAR CIRCUMSTANCES… between the dates (years) that our Unjustly predicaments came about onto our laps in 2008, to the issues with probation transfer, how the Probation Officers and Police DON’T EVEN KNOW THE LAWS! (since they cannot make you Register in a State your NOT residing in, ESPECIALLY Since it will confuse the REGISTRY Database System, therefore causing a Failure to Comply within the Registry in one of either 2 of the states), also I noticed even our girlfriends were Jenny too… I have since gotten my Paralegal a while back ago, and know the insides and outer workings of how the Registry operates! All it’s errors found in the States Public Auditor-Audit Reports, and so on!


    Get my contact info from Anne, or just go ahead and EMAIL ME and we can talk over the phone TRUST ME YOUR GONNA WANNA LISTEN TO WHAT I HAVE TO SAY! AND I WOULD VERY MUCH LIKE TO HEAR YOU OUT MORE AS WELL MY FRIEND!

    *LOOK at the TRUE STORIES: “UNFATHOMABLE MAGNITUDE OF PROOF & EVIDENCE OF CORRUPTION” and can read my incredible story to go alongside your incredible story… My email should be there. If I didn’t mention it make a comment with yours or with yours, or just work with Anne and She will get us acquainted okay my friend. Looking forward to it!!!

    I have ALOT of good people on my side, OUR SIDES! THE BEST IS YET TO COME

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